With Valentine’s Day coming tomorrow, I thought it would be fitting to address the perils of being single on what is considered to be the most romantic day of the year. I started to brainstorm answers to the following questions. How should a single person celebrate Valentine’s Day and overcome loneliness? How can a single person enjoy Valentine’s Day as well as any couple?
My prayer for the blog is to provide solid encouragement inspired by Biblical truths. I’d sincerely like to veer away from fairytales and inspiration without substance. Because I know how it feels to be unaided in the pursuit to live happily as a single person, I strive to offer Christian singles the best help I can give. Trying to understand why you have not fallen in love and then going about any means necessary to make that happen can be grueling. You will likely read, listen to, or try just about anything to make it happen.
Initially, I was going to post a grand list of things for singles to do on Valentine’s Day. Then I realized that if you are like me, you have Googled the topic and read them all already…been there…done that. The unadulterated truth is maybe those clever tips will make your Valentine’s Day better and maybe they won’t. You’ve heard these recommendations before I’m sure.
*Pamper yourself *Hang out with friends *Do something for someone less privileged *Join an online dating site *Get out and meet new people
I have tried all of them. Yet one problem remained. Attempting to occupy Valentine’s Day with an activity to take my mind off being single was only a temporary fix. Perhaps the advice above has been able to deliver some out of their Valentine’s Day misery forever, but they were not permanent winners for me.
For many years as a single person all I wanted to know was how to not be single anymore. Give me a man and I’ll be complete. Any advice to get me down that path was more than welcome. Frustration set in when nothing seemed to work permanently. Hanging with friends was great…until we all went home. Pampering myself was wonderful…until I had to redirect my attention back to my daily responsibilities. Online dating was exciting…until I had to filter through dozens of questionables just to get to one possible who turned out to be an unlikely. Admittedly, two of the best pieces of advice I received was to help others with their needs and physically get out and meet new people. Those things coupled with prayer were huge steps that led me to Ronnie, but it didn’t happen overnight. So, at the end of a Valentine’s Day, I remained chagrined.
What was the real foundation for my sorrow? Why was being single such torment for me? If I had a husband would all be well with my soul? Was it healthy to look to a man to complete me? I couldn’t answer with a confident, “yes” anymore.