Singles Ministry News! – One of my best friends, Robbie Mac, has released his new CD. And yours truly had the honor of being a part of this project! It is the “Save and Single Word, Prayer and Affirmation CD – Volume 1”. This album contains Spoken Word, Prayers and Affirmations from seven, spirit-filled artists, spanning two countries. These brothers and sisters will remind you to tell doubt and defeat to get out of the way, so you can live a victorious life in Christ. Click here to listen and download!
Text Yes for Premarital Sex? We Must Do Better.
The other morning I was listening to Roland Martin’s radio show. He reported a story about a mother who gave her son advice to protect him while having premarital sex. She advised her son to get prior approval, via text message, before having sex with a young lady. She also advises that he get an approval confirmation after the act, via text message.
Many people believe this is a good idea. Before laying down with women, men should have them send a “Yes” text message to their phone. It makes the transaction nice and clean, no misunderstandings. Hmmm….
As an advocate for abstinence until marriage, it is hard for me to wrap my brain around this so called safety dating procedure. The mother’s intent is for her son to not be falsely accused of rape. It is true that the lives of many men have been destroyed because of women falsely accusing them of sexual misconduct.
Yet still I wonder… Is this the best advice we can give? Get an approved text message first, saying that if we are intimate tonight, we are both okay with it.
I’m not convinced.
The theory looks good on the surface but at the bottom of the bucket there are many holes. How well will an electronic note hold up in the court of law? What if she says that she changed her mind and he pressured her anyway? And what comfort is a text message to two people who sleep together and walk away with regret and shame?
With all of the perils that come with premarital intimacy, our greatest concern shouldn’t be that our sons are not falsely accused of rape. Loneliness, emptiness, brokenness, insecurities, and fear are the more devastating culprits to arise when participating in premarital sex. We must educate and advise people to protect themselves from these things. Those who have been there and done that, owe better advice to the less experienced.
There is no way to create a safe place for men and women to give their bodies away freely. In my life and through the lives of others, I have seen nothing else that works better than the application of God’s guidance for relationships.
There is no safe place for sin.
Sin will have its damaging effect on us wherever we are, no matter how we choose to perform it.
There is no safety net strong enough to securely hold us from the emotional and spiritual backlash of sex without a covenant. We can’t give up or be ashamed to share our salvation story. Those of us who are older and wiser owe it to God to teach the next generation the benefits of sexual purity. We can advise our brothers and sisters better than this.